What do you think about gender?
I published my first post today in the RBMW series on the books prefaces. I’m curious to see at the outset where you fall on this issue, so I created a little poll. Take two seconds and let me know where you are coming from. Feel free to comment about your answer especially if you voted for confused or other. :)
March 2nd, 2009 at 2:49 pm
I was just curious what you folks believe about gender issues in general…
March 2nd, 2009 at 2:52 pm
If, by complementarian, you mean that men and women are equal in value but different in role (or function), then that would be me. I believe the Trinity, itself, is set up in a hierarchy. God is, after all, a God of order rather than chaos. To me, anarchy is a form of chaos. So, I believe there to be a hierarchy within the godhead as well as within the family and the marriage.
March 2nd, 2009 at 2:52 pm
Yeah I believe one of the chapters in the book I am going through hits this. I’m not yet convinced that there is an eternal hierarchy within the Trinity myself, but I’ll dig into the issue more soon.
March 2nd, 2009 at 2:54 pm
This is a really interesting question / survey Dwayne. I’ve been having a lot of conversation around the topic of gender roles lately. Obviously it is a huge point of contention and critique for many regarding Mars Hill. I’ve been having trouble deciding where I fall exactly. I chose “Other” as I feel that these two concepts do not necessarily need to be in direct conflict. I believe that we are given complementary gender roles, but that the question of Egalitarian or Complementarian is not generalizable. Everyone is unique in their person and their relationship. I think that the application or living out of a complementarian viewpoint can be oppressive or confining. I know too many fantastic couples that break the traditional mold of the man as the head of the family. The idea of couples united in marriage as complements to one another, in my admittedly limited understanding, does not need to be defined by the man working, providing and making all final decisions and the woman caring for family and offering support, emotional and otherwise. I had a conversation with a friend recently who feels very strongly about the traditional male-female complementarian roles. He does not have a strong education or career track, his wife does. Whether she wants to work or not, he feels strongly that she should be the one who stays home with children while he works and provides for the family. I found myself struggling a bit with this… while generally I think most women want to stay home with children, not all do and sometimes I think it makes more sense for the man to. I’m not entirely convinced that this defines my viewpoint as Egalitarian though — as I don’t really believe in a pure equality either, but more of an identifying of gifts, interests, and situation to determine roles and responsibilities. I guess to a large extent, I think this question is not worth argument because if men and women are in relationship with one another operating with a true spirit of service to one another, then headship is sort of irrelevant. Thoughts?
March 2nd, 2009 at 3:08 pm
I think I see where you are coming from Matt. I believe that complementarians may be guilty of speaking where Scripture is silent at times. I’ll probably get into that more in this series at some point.
I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that if someone believes headship is irrelevant in a healthy marriage then they probably are not complementarian. I’m just saying… :)
It sounds like you are saying the two views don’t have to be in conflict as long as they stop meaning what they mean. Sometimes the group supplied choices for a given theological question won’t completely fit everyone.
Have you read this paper by chance? http://www.cbmw.org/Resources/Articles/Summaries-of-the-Egalitarian-and-Complementarian-Positions
March 2nd, 2009 at 10:19 pm
I think one of the biggest things that cause controversy with this issue is when we allow our “feelings” to come in and make our decision. There are so many scriptures where differences are not only pointed out, but used to paint a wonderful picture of Christ and the Church. If we bring our “feelings” into it we can easily say it should be this way or that. I think for me at least, I have to look at my heart and knowing that it’s deceitful make a choice to believe the Word of the Lord…
“25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. 28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. 33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.” (Ephesians 5:25-33 ESV)
Seems like there’s a distinction made to me. Does that mean that we Lord ourselves over one another…no. We lay our lives down for each other in service to the King!
*Thanks for asking this question Dwayne.
Lee
“Falling Up!”
March 2nd, 2009 at 10:43 pm
Stacie and I are in a book club with two other Christian couples who are egalitarians and we just chose a book on this subject to read! It’s by Stanley Grenz who is an egalitarian. Stacie and I are complimentarians.
I should be sharing more comments and questions later. Just wanted to let you know for now.